Saturday, October 23, 2010


You guys should know something. I enjoy watching C-SPAN.  Yes, you read that last sentence correctly.  I enjoy watching C-SPAN.  Some people think C-SPAN is boring. Well these people have obviously not seen Hereafter.  I can honestly say that I think that this is the worst movie that I have seen all year. There is slow, and then there is agonizingly slow, and then there is Hereafter slow.

Hereafter is the story about George Lonegan (Matt Damon) who has a gift/curse to talk to dead people.  But he doesn’t talk to them in a “Sixth Sense” kind of way( it’s more of a “boring “ kind of way).  He is a psychic who relays messages from the living to the dead so that the living can move on with their lives.  Lonegan has retired from this psychic work, but his older brother convinces him to do a few readings for his friends.  Lonegan has to decide whether or not he wants to start doing readings again for money.  Heck, times are tough, and I heard that psychics are in high demand again.

The movie follows three separate storylines.  One story takes place in America, one in France, and one in England.  So you’d think that one of these storylines would be interesting.  Nope. It felt like I was watching three boring movies at the same time. Since one of the story lines takes place in France you have to read subtitles a lot of the movie.  I don’t mind reading subtitles; I just hate reading subtitles when I have a headache. 
The only ray of sunshine in this movie was Bryce Dallas Howard (The Village/Lady in the Water).  She is in the movie for a total of about 12 minutes.  I’m a huge fan of The Village so I was happy to see her in this movie.  I just wish there was more of her in the movie and less of everything else.   She plays Matt Damon’s love interest. 

I had only read great reviews going into this movie so I’d thought that it would certainly be worth my money.  Nah….just wait till this movie comes out on Redbox or something.  If you are a Clint Eastwood fan then you will like this movie.  It is artsy and all that other junk that Clint Eastwood does.  I am not good with slow movies.  I probably looked at my phone 15 times to see if it was almost over.  As soon as the movie was over, the first words to come out of my mouth were, “Finally. It’s Over.”

Save your money. Go see Inception at the dollars or something.  


  1. remember how we were ready for it to be over at 11? and then it didn't end until 12:20? yeah...pure agony. except for bryce. she was funny. but she was only in like 1/10 of this movie. sheesh.

  2. worse than the last airbender?

  3. I actually enjoyed it last night. Some parts of the script were, well we'll say they were dry. The directing was amazing, and I was impressed with Eastwoods work. It was an interstesting way of non-denominationally saying that there IS something after this life, and it works to connect different peoples lives.
    Funny you mentioned the subtitles that way, maybe the headache exacerbated the meandering story. One redeeming action moment was that tsunami, yet I am glad it didn't turn into Nic Cages 'Knowing' which was awful.
    Lastly, I have some beef with you on 'The Village', because that movie Sucks. Everything Shamylan (spelling?) makes is a dissapointment, especially that lame 'twist' at the end.

    Love reading your reviews, keep them coming.

  4. I probably would have gone to see this movie this afternoon with a very cool date...but there is no way I'm spending good money to see it now! Thanks for saving me the pennies!

  5. Oh ya....and I LOVE your rating system on this one!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  6. Very clever rating. I agree 100% on your review. Would you recomend paranormal activity 2. I hear it did well in its first day.

  7. Justin! I love your reviews, but I can't access your review for RED. Each time I click on it I am addressed with an error saying that blogger cannot find the page on your blog. Can you try re-posting? (or if I'm the only one not able to read it, email it to me, I'm planning on taking a date to it today)